Love Story: Part 2

In part 1, I explained where I'd been & where my heart was during the season of life when I met Adam. Well let's back up.... before I was even to that place of commitment, I had an unwanted encounter. 

I didn't know anyone going to UK when I went, but you know how when you get to college & you just hang out with the few people you know from high school for the first few weeks? Well Adam is from Ohio, so there were just a handful of people he graduated with at UK, and a few of them lived in my dorm. We lived in a 23 story tower, and I happened to live on the 22nd floor, around the corner from a girl he graduated with. Adam was..... let's just say, not in the same that I was spiritually. He was a faithful church goer up until the day he left for college, but he wasn't really sure what he believed & college was, well college for him. So that's where his heart was. 

One night, during the first few weeks of school, I had tucked myself in nice and early for an 8am class. Sometime around 3 am, my roommate and I woke up to doors slamming in the hall, girls erupting  in little girlish screams, and footsteps running up and down the halls. We both sighed and fidgeted, tossed & turned, as we tried to fall back asleep. My eyes had just shut when I was abruptly awoken to a door slamming against the wall outside of my door and a girl screaming, "I FREAKING HATE YOU!!!" but she didn't say freaking... she said another f word. That was it. I had HAD ENOUGH, and someone was getting an earful. 

So i flung my covers off, marched to the door, and flung it open. I didn't care who I encountered there, but I was putting an end to the madness. I assumed the screaming girl would be on the receiving end, but no... there was a WIDE eyed young looking boy standing there like a deer caught in the headlights with an empty cup in one hand and a squirt gun in the other. 

I can only imagine the look on my face when I sternly decreed, "I don't know who you are, or where you came from, and I DON'T CARE! But I suggest you return there because it is 3 am on a weeknight and some of us have class at 8 in the morning!!!" And I slammed the door in the terrified boy's face.

Now I have to say, this is so unbelievably uncharacteristic of me, but it was 3 am on a week night, and don't things always seem 50 times more dramatic in the middle of the night? And anyone who knows me knows that I am not a pleasant person when awoken. And I'm not half as gutsy as I was 10 years ago. 

So what had happened? This guy had been drinking (yes at like 2 am on a Tuesday night) with friends of his from high school, and a few other girls on our floor. At some point, a water fight broke out & spilled out into the hallways... hence the girly screaming, running, and slamming doors. The 22nd floor was the last floor that anyone lived on & the elevators went to, and the 23rd was a big open study room. The door up to the 23rd floor was directly across from mine and was one of those big heavy push the bar to make it open doors. Their water fight had made it's way up to the 23rd floor and this screaming girl was running for cover down the staircase. As she hit the door at full speed, she got a cup full of water thrown on her, by who else, but young looking guy. She ran off & he chased her, reaching my door as I threw it open. 

He claims I said something about crawling back into your hole, but who was the sober one who clearly remembers the story? And please, I'd never say something THAT ridiculous. He ran off to warn the others about the crazy screaming girl. I shut my door, climbed back in bed, went back to sleep with peace & quiet. I woke up the next morning, went off to my 8am class, and didn't really think much of it. I don't think I'd even recognized the boy with an earful of my sass if I passed him on campus. 

And THAT was the first time I laid eyes on the guy who I would some day marry. So how in the world did we get from a late night unwanted encounter to the alter? You'll just have to wait and see. 

And just to prove that he looked so stinkin young.....

World's Best Cookies

I have long planned to do a post on all of the things I've made/ idea's I've implemented that I found on pinterest. However, these cookies deserve their own time in the spotlight. They are absolutely my new favorites. S'more cookies. SO GOOD. 

There are a few recipes for these out there, but I like this one from The Girl Who Ate Everything the best. She added a little bit of cinnamon that make the flavor just right. It's a wonderful gooey chocolate chip cookie with the taste of s'mores. 

The first time I tried to make them it was an epic fail.... because I didn't have graham crackers. They are crucial. Otherwise, the marshmallows fall through and stick to the pan. They are a little less dense than normal chocolate chops, so they need something to melt into. 

They have chocolate chips in them, but with 5 minutes left to bake, you add Hershey's bars. 

Perfection. I highly recommend trying these babies. In my opinion, they are even better the next day once they've hardened a bit. I've made them 3 times so far, and will surely be making lots more in the future. 

Thank you Pinterest for providing a world of inspiration for wonderful things. 

Here is the link to my sweets & such board on Pinterest. There are almost 200 recipes for yummy sweet things, most that I'd never thought of before. Enjoy! 

AiYi's Village

One of the people I mentioned that I really missed is my sweet AiYi 

{which means auntie}. 

This sweet woman came to our house in EA 2 days a week for a couple hours to help me.... and trust me, I needed the help. She'd do anything from help me clean & do odd things around the house to help me wash & cut veggies and prepare my meals (an undertaking when you live in a developing country with really bad water that has stuff in it that needs "killing" before it can be consumed), but more than anything else she brought a little spark of joy to my life. 

She makes me look ginormous, & Adam even larger but at 4'9" and all of 92 lbs (she got on my scale one day and asked, "What does this mean!?" and I said, "THAT YOU ARE TINY!!!") she has more strength & energy to put the both of us to shame. This woman works HARD. Coming to help me & another woman was just what she did on the side; she & her husband are farmers who work hard to farm this land......

During planting & harvest she would spend days bent over planting & picking, working the land. 

These are "You Hua" the flowers that produce rapeseed oil. They beautifully covered every inch of land where we lived in the spring. They also grow corn & a few other crops.

Last spring she invited us to come out to her house during Tomb Sweeping Festival. We were so excited. We had a driver take us 45 minutes outside of our little town to her village. 

This is the entrance to their compound. This house in the front is the neighbors, but theirs is built similarly, just a little older. Most homes like these have multiple people or familiies living in the, each with a different section of the upstairs that has been finished, and everyone shares an unfinished downstairs.  

She told us that when she had her first baby, that they lived in this hut.... with her husband's parents, sister, brother, and brother's wife. Her water buffalo lives in it now and the floor is covered in poo, but I could still envision what that must have been like, with a new born baby 20 years ago. 

This is still their bathroom. A little outhouse with a squatty potty with no plumbing hooked up, just a hill for everything to run down. 

They don't have running water inside, just this spigot outside that they fill buckets with.  

This is her kitchen in the unfinished downstairs of her house. She has a small fridge in another room, but this is it for the kitchen. A few pieces of secondhand furniture to store things & serve as counter tops. 

She cooks on a little hot plate that gets the job done. 

Being at their house made me re-think poverty & wealth. For all of you reading this, it would seem like they live in poverty, with no indoor plumbing & an outhouse but I would challenge that thinking {as I'm challenging my own}. They have everything that they need. It is lavish by no means, but sufficient. And they are HAPPY.

They have a few outfits, and many second hand things like furniture & a TV that they are so thankful for & don't take for granted. They haven't been bogged down by stuff & a desire to be constantly seeking more. As farmers, they have worked SO hard for all of the things that they have & to get where they are. 

I pray that they would one day find the only TRUE source of satisfaction for their souls. I am thankful that they haven't been blinded by greed & that evidences of their creator are all over their lives.

 They aren't like many EA-ian couples who are satisfied with putting up with each other. For many, getting ahead is the most important thing in their lives, not their marriages & families. You can see the my AiYi & her husband aren't like them. He is a sweet & gentle man with a huge smile. 

Back to our visit....

She was happy to cook for us.... and was obviously so thoughtful about the process. Most people when they have you in their homes cook the local specialties, that many foreigners wouldn't find super appealing. That's what I was expecting. But she went to the market and bought vegetables that she knew I liked... not because she asked & I told her, but based solely on what she has helped me wash & prep at my house {for western food}.

She knows I like Celery, cauliflower, & peas. And let me tell you, I can guarantee you that she forced herself to endure those 3 dishes that were pretty bland in their book {albeit DELICIOUS for me} instead of the other way around- when foreigners endure eating the delicacies to be polite. I couldn't get over the fact that she did this for us {well, really for me... Adam LOVES spicy stuff}. She made the LaZiJi, the super spicy chicken dish, at the last minute because Adam told her he loved spice.  

After we ate we took a little tour of the rest of their house and land. 

We met her pets. 

This is her water buffalo, who doesn't have a name, who was pregnant at the time & had a little water buffalo baby in July! I asked her, "What's her name!?" and she said, "Name? It doesn't have a name, it's a water buffalo." We had the same conversation about the dogs & chickens. "So what do you say when you want the dogs to come to you?" "Dog, come" "But then they all come, how do they know which one you want?" She just laughed and shook her head. She knows all about my Lucy, and probably thinks we're nuts for treating her like a member of our family. 

We walked through one of their fields

This is an alter in one of the downstairs rooms where her mother in law places things to worship their ancestors. 

AiYi makes amazing tapestries and was working on this horse one at the time. She also makes beautiful minority needlework as well. So talented.

Right before we left, her mother in law, sister in law, & niece came home. I was so excited to meet them. I had to beg her mother in law to take a picture with me. You can see how much life she has lived by the lines on her face. I always wonder what people in her generation & demographic have seen & endured. She is around my dad's age, but looks so much older.  

She spends her days picking tea leaves with other women like these. 

The next time you have a cup of green tea, you can think about this beautiful woman picking the leaves on the other side of the world. 

We took a long stroll back through the village to try to catch a bus back to our town. 

As we walked, we saw many different aspects of village life. 

Because it was a holiday, everyone's families had gathered to eat together. 

We were a sight to see- foreigners in the remote village isn't something you see everyday. 

She told us that when she walked back to her house after she left us, people were asking her all kinds of questions, even if she worked for a foreign company. 

There were lots of water buffalo everywhere- naturally as everyone farms. It'd be like a farmer in America having a combine & a tractor. 

Some houses were nicer than others...

but many old architectural elements were still around. 

We made a little pit stop at the public restrooms. 

And were on our way, back to "big city living".... hardly, but it's all relative. 

I'm thankful to have had the privilege of going places like this & meet wonderful people like these. 

I'm still pondering the whole poverty & wealth thing, and maybe I'm off, 

But my gosh do I miss this sweet woman....  I miss her big smile & laugh and that loud, "AHHH NI HAAOOOO!!!" when she walks in our front door... all 4'9" 92lbs. of her. I didn't know so much life, love & hard work could come out of such a wee little thing. And I never fathomed when I met her that I'd miss her as much as I do. She didn't understand why I cried when I told her bye, and she'll never know how much of a blessing it was for me to have known her. I think of her often. 

It's a Love Story Baby Just Say Yes

I've had writers block lately & was expressing my frustration over it to my dear friend Catherine. She enthusiastically encouraged me to write out our "love story." People often ask me how Adam & I met and started dating. Little do they know what they're in for. It's a good one. Not necessarily in an "awww that's so sweet" way, but more like "you have got to be kidding me... that's hilarious" kind of a way. It eventually get's to the "aw that's so sweet" part. But it was a pretty comedic road to get to there.

One disclaimer before I start: I want to acknowledge that my story looks really different than a lot of others'. I know what it's like to want something, something as significant as a "life stage" {if you can even call it that} and to have to wait for that, when you just really don't want to. I know what it's like to see other people who have what you want & got it seemingly effortlessly, without waiting. And I know that getting engaged when you're 21 & married when you're 22 would certainly fall into that category. So i just want to acknowledge that it might be really hard for some people to read my story & see that I got what they wanted at such a young age. If that is the case, please know that I want to care about you & know that it's just plain hard. I hope that in sharing my story, you can see how the Lord wrote it in order to draw me to Himself. I'm confident that He is doing the same in your life, just as He is during the season of waiting I'm in. And if that is you, I'd love to sit and talk & hear your heart. 

So today I'll start with some "background information." Until I went to college, my world was completely {understatemet} wrapped up in relationships with boys. I thought I was a normal teenage girl, but looking back I can see how enslaved I was to finding every ounce of my worth in a desire to be desired. And not like the last few years of high school, but starting when I was a mere pre-teen girl. I have the notes that I discovered cleaning out the attic with my mom a few weeks ago for proof. Side note, when you were in middle school, did everyone use the word "French" as a verb?! No, only in the drama of Liberty Bell Middle School?  I digress. ANYWAY, from way too early I was obsessed with boys & didn't go long without one in my life. And I definitely dealt with the ramifications of that for a long time. Messy, hard, destructive ramifications. That He has redeemed for my good & His glory.

{me & my bff Jami in 8th grade... at Dollywood, with the boys} 

SO once I arrived at the University of Kentucky to start my freshman year with NO ONE from my former world at home, I decided it was time to start over & take a little turn, especially in the boy department. Actually, I met several older, godly girls who really took me under their wing who desired to pursue righteousness instead of push boundaries {foreign concept to this girl} & seek to satisfy their hearts in the Lord. The more time I spent with them, the more I began to understand how empty my tendencies were. So, there was some serious surrendering to be done. Part of that came with a big realization that I needed to not date for a season. There was no way I was going to learn to find my significance in the Lord as long as the major source of what it has once been in was still in my life.

I had heard of people "vowing" to be single for x amount of time but I was afraid of not making it to x point in time & being a fraud. So I just said, I'm not going to be in a relationship for now. Not that my heart was jumping for joy at the idea and the desire just disappeared. In fact, I had a crush on plenty of great guys during that season who had they have shown interest, I'm sure I would have jumped at the opportunity to date. But the Lord definitely protected me & knew what I needed. I learned to begin saying, "Lord if it isn't your will for me to be with this person, then change the desire of my heart" instead of obsessing about how I could "make it happen" & get what I wanted. And guess what.... He did.

{right in the middle of this season of enjoying friendships & growing}

So that's where I was emotionally when I met my husband.... who so very little did I know would someday be my husband.... Who I met right around the time I made that decision to be single. This is where is get interesting my friends. Stay tuned.